identifying five examples of methods of development or rhetorical devices in the rant. For each one, explain how this example enhances the effectiveness of the text.


IDENTIFY: What device is it? Quote (copy) the example.


EXPLIAN: What effect does this example of this device have on the reader or listener?

OR

How does the device help the writer/speaker persuade the audience? Does it establish ethos, pathos, or logos?


(Every now and then an issue comes along that transcends politics, that transcends all socio-economic realities, and sometimes the truth needs to be said, no matter how painful that truth may be to some people – this is one of those times, and this is it: just because you are on an escalator, that does not mean you have to stop walking.


Up or down, it is an escalator. It is not a ride at Canada’s Wonderland. It was designed to keep people moving faster, which is why it’s called an escalator, not a slow-things-down-alator. And if you must stop on an escalator because you’ve got bad knees or you’re just a much calmer person than me, you have to stay to the right. The left lane is a passing lane. That means you cannot put your shopping bag there. That also means your best friend cannot park there and talk to you about why you really should have bought that blouse at Value Village. And you want to know why? Because when you do that, everyone behind you wants to kill you.


And I only bring this up because I am a calm and rational person, but I swear to God if I ever end up in prison, it will be because of something that happened on an escalator. Either that, or near the front doors of a shopping mall or an airport. OK, we all know that sometimes big buildings are overwhelming. That does not mean that you get to walk through the front door and just stop and look around for three minutes. If you need to get your bearings, the rules of the road apply here – you must pull over. Find a wall. You can spend all the time you want over there.


And while we’re on the subject, if you get in an elevator before letting people off an elevator, that should be a criminal offense with mandatory sentencing. Honestly! I don’t know why they don’t teach this stuff in schools. Look, we are heading into the holiday season people, there’s going to be big crowds, it’s stressful enough. Peace and goodwill is the standard wish for the season. That’s only going to happen if everyone keeps moving.)